Everyone loves a candid shot that has been posted on Instagram, but what most people do not realize is the real emotion that has been hidden behind this candid image! This “candid” image is what helps other outsiders think that one becomes pleased when they are in a relationship, or they are happy because they are in a relationship. Here the most critical point that others forget to understand is that there is nothing like just because you are in a relationship, you are happy, or because you are in a relationship that makes you happy. No, it does not always work out like that. Then do people actually stay in a bad relationship, and if yes, then why do people stay in bad relationships? If you are one among those, who thought you need to find the answer to this unanswered question, then here it is! You can now find out what it is that makes people stay in bad relations even when they know it is precisely what keeps on hurting them.
While there are people who stay in a lousy relation while knowing that it is not going to get them anywhere, but there are also other people who do not realize that it is a bad relationship and keep on staying in one. For both these categories, here is how to identify whether you are actually in one and if yes, then what is the reason that makes you stay put rather than taking action.
Here are some of the most common and understandable reasons as to why people choose to stay in a bad relationship no matter what happens:
1. People do not know what true love is:
True Love? Well, that is only what exists in novels and comic books or in dramas, is what most people would think! Does true love even exist is what most people would even ask when you start with this topic. This exact moment when people fail to understand true love is exactly when people start falling prey to little to zero love being offered through relations. They settle for even hate relations in such cases.
2. An overwhelming feeling that you are unworthy of love:
Ever had a feeling that you are unworthy of something, then you know exactly what this is about. The moment you belittle yourself and think you are unworthy of a particular feeling or are not perfect the way you are when you tend to stay in unhealthy relationships and start deteriorating your mental health.
3. Fears that trap you:
With so many fears surrounding you, you know nothing you can do about the same! The list does not even end once you start counting the fear. Some of them include the fear of being left alone, the fear of not being loved again, the fear of what people are going to think, the fear of what will happen next, fear of getting judged by all around you, the fear of not finding another one who could see you perfect, fear of what to do in your life without the presence of that one person, how you can now be able to overcome the hurdles that come your way, the fear of you losing the only means of security that you had with you and so on to add to the list. With all these fears surrounding yourself, how is it even possible to leave that toxic relation behind!
4. No thorough knowledge about love or relation:
Some kids fall prey to some of the bad ties as they are not thoroughly educated about what love is or what relationships can do to them. While this is not only true with kids but it is also one of the harsh realities that adults often face as well. People tend to face such issues when they think that keeping a “healthy” relationship needs a lot of “hard work” While it is true the most relations need work to be done, it definitely is not “hard work”! Sometimes you do expect something from someone, and that is entirely alright. But what is not OK is, you not acting the way that you have been expecting others to behave towards yourself. This creates a toxic relationship as well. You can call it to work, or you can also call it something you do for your loved ones. If you try and if it is still hard for you both, then that just means that it is not entirely healthy, and you ought to stop right there!
5. Been in pain for too long:
Being addicted to a drug is what most of us might have heard of, but have you ever seen a person getting addicted to pain? Well, this happens when you have been so accustomed to the pain that it is almost frightening to get out of it! It is also observed n some cases that pain from a loved one tends to give you satisfaction, and hence you pretend to be alright and continue with a toxic relationship.
6. Getting too dependent on another person:
Just like being addicted to pain, one tends to start getting too reliant on the person causing you too much pain that it is really hard to let go of him or her. This can be considered as a psychological means to survive the pain as they do not really know what will happen to them without having that person by the side of the pain that caused them.
7. The precious memory sake:
Just like every relation start, there are always good memories which then are accompanied by bad happenings. There are people who know that what is happening to them is not something they want but is also something they want to run away from. But what happens is that they tend to hold back just owing to the few good memories that they had. No matter what, each and every relationship does take a lot of years to be built up, and breaking it down in an instant is really hard no matter how much you try to convince yourself.
But is making yourself stay in such a relationship a good idea? Well, definitely not, and hence here are some of the steps which, even though challenging, will help you free yourself from the toxic relation you had fallen prey to:
- Once you realize that the relationship you are in is a bad one, then at that moment itself, try and be conscious about how it is affecting you and how you can solve it by talking to the other person. If this does not work in your case, then you might as well just walk out of that relation.
- Try and understand what that one thing is holding your relation with that one particular person from getting healthy is and how you can turn it around.
- Try to love yourself! Start keeping the opinions of people around you second and star considering yourself as your number one priority.
- Do not hold back on someone else. Because if that person is capable of giving you pain, then you are not supposed to hold it in and accept it all.
Lastly, it is time for you to step up and take action. Be yourself and love yourself no matter what hardships come and how big the storm is!